April 9, 2012

After his friend spent nearly 15 minutes complaining about the new TOTAL RECALL movie...


43 comments:

  1. Find this dog, Smithers. I want to make him my executive vice president.

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  2. This guy for President!

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    1. Oh wait, that's exactly what Anonymous above me just said. Only they said it better. Sorry about that folks.

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    2. No, the Simpsons said it better

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  3. Well, excuuuuse me for liking it when Hollywood comes up with original ideas, instead of remakes and capes! Bah, peasants.

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    1. Originality is over-rated. There's only so many ideas they can come up with before needing to resort to "remakes and capes", you know. At least, ideas that will actually bring in a goddamn audience.

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    2. There's nothing wrong with liking original ideas or disliking remakes. The issue is spending so much time being so pissed off about it.

      Bitching about it isn't going to change it. All you can do is not go to the movie. That's a lot quieter and wastes less of your life and the lives of those subjected to your ranting.

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    3. I didn't say there was anything wrong with liking original ideas or disliking remakes. I was just saying that Originality isn't all it's cracked up to be. Yeah, making a remake of a movie that hasn't even reached it's 30th anniversary is a dumb move, but I'd rather watch a remake to a good movie than watch a completely original movie that turns out to be absolute shit, and I think most of the movie-watching world would agree with that.

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  4. Every comic book store should print this strip and post it above the register in their store.

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    1. Agreed, it should be mandatory.

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  5. @jnthn: No! YOU said it better. They just reused an old quote from an old Simpsons episode and suggested a lesser title than you suggested. At least you put some thought and creativity into your comment! Bah! I need a lie down.

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  6. After watching the Total Recall remake trailer, I am actually looking forward to it... with or without a three breasted hooker.

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    1. As someone who saw the original in the theaters as an eighteen year old, I demand three breasted hookers in the remake, or I'm calling shenanigans.

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    2. Word is that the movie WILL have the three breasted hooker.

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  7. Way to stab your friend in the back, asshole, even if he is an asshole to.

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    1. You misspelled 'too'
      HTH

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    2. How is calling him out on his bullshit stabbing him in the back?

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    3. The fact that you don't know means you're an asshole too.

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  8. I love this guy.

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  9. Colin Farrell is no Arnold Schwarzenegger. Also people shouldn't relax entertainment is a pretty important component is making everyone's shitty lives less miserable. Having bad movie remakes is like having old batteries dumped in your water supply.

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    1. Brad the Dad4/09/2012 2:53 PM

      I generally agree, though with bad movies, you just have to not go. Getting angry wastes your energy--resentment is when you take poison and hope the other guy dies, as they say. As for Colin Farrell, though I haven't read the PKD story, my understanding is the main guy is just a working schlub--a far cry from a Schwarzeneggian action hero. (As are nearly all of PKD's main characters.)

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    2. dude sounds like your life sucks.

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    3. You poor little thing. Are people making movies you don't like? Shame on them. Let's all bitch and whine about it incessantly to make you feel all better.

      Twat.

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    4. People should be vocal about how shitty entertainment media is, if they weren't there would be no qualitative review of it. User reviews are generally ones most people trust. I'm not a big movie guy but definitely it feels like most big game magazines are on the dole.

      Certainly hating something BEFORE it comes out isn't quite the same, but yeah I do think it's better if people are critical rather than whatever you're trying to be ... Dante from Clerks? "Being a 'creator' would be so much better if it weren't for the audience *waaaah*"

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    5. "User reviews are generally ones most people trust."

      Says who? Most people I know ignore them completely, because they realize people just like you are dying to get online, bitch like junior high girls about anything and everything, and pretend like anyone gives a fuck about their opinions. You're not doing the world any favors by crying about movies and video games you don't like.

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    6. Whoa we get it, you despise customers and consumers. I thought I covered this with that Clerks crack, but here you are repeating the same bitchy opinions about other people's opinions as if it doesn't make you an even more contemptible piece of feces than the people you hate.

      I'm sorry that user reviews caused you mental scarring and I hope in the future your book/crafts/used clothes sell better on amazon/etsy/ebay. Despite your delusions what consumers think about products actually is a pretty valuable resource.

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    7. There you go again, pretending to be some kind of martyr for a world of consumers who'd be lost without your relentless complaining. Oh, and anyone who doesn't join in your habitual whining is just out to sell something to clueless, unsuspecting morons who haven't been exposed to your pathetic ranting. Fucking christ. Just admit that you're utterly miserable, you live to bitch and ONLY to bitch, and clinging to this absurd fantasy of providing a "valuable resource" to humanity is the only way you can tolerate living your own "shitty" life. Or just, you know, get off your cross, you sniveling cunt.

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  10. I'm hoping that this new movie is more true to the Philip K. Dick book than that '80s action farce. Get off my lawn!

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    1. There's not a lot to the original short story. It's basically a Twilight Zone episode with a double twist. I don't think it would make a very interesting movie.

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  11. Anon 10:33, it was actually a PKD short story, "We Can Remember This for You Wholesale". Hopefully you are right, as very little of the original was based on the story past the "concept" itself.

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  12. This.
    A frigging billion times THIS!

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    1. Brad the Dad4/09/2012 3:28 PM

      I think the fact that they're calling it "Total Recall" has pretty much dashed that hope. However, Dick's original title was a riff on a popular novel, musical and film "I Can Get It for You Wholesale," about the New York garment industry, so it's a pretty dated reference. (The novel and musical were from the thirties, the film from '51) So what could the call it? Memories of Mars? Red Planet Rhumba? Moons over Mars?

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  13. I don't know.

    On the one hand, most remakes of late are turds crapped out by committee in an attempt to create a new "franchise" on whatever "property" hasn't already been done yet. (A remake of "It's Alive"? Seriously? At least the 'edgier' "Spider Baby" remake and a no-budget live-action "Last Unicorn" died on the drawing board...) It's become so bad that publicity for the last blink-and-you-missed-it "Three Musketeers" refers to the film as a "reboot."

    On the other hand, you can ignore the rehashes--and if they anger you before they even hit the screen, then obviously you should. There are several valid reasons I can't bear to watch any version of "Star Wars" anymore, and they all begin with "George Lucas."

    BUT then you have to stay out of the loop while your friends rush to see something and then jabber endlessly about it for the next week or so. Curiosity will hound you; not every remake/reboot is so very awful.

    So yeah, guy's a jerk. His friend is venting. Maybe it's tiresome to him, but there's a reason behind it, and being a dick to him in response doesn't help. Pretty certain the guy has his OWN pet subject to nerd-rage over far longer than anyone else gives a damn...

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    1. shut up

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    2. I bet the same "jerk" has some cunty friend who cries about George Lucas, too. No surprise you'd think he's a dick.

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    3. The butthurt is strong in this anon.

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  14. At lest Total Recall is being honest that its a remake. Not like Lockout, which is describing itself as "Die Hard meets Blade Runner" with no mention of Escape from New York.

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  15. My favourite thing is that he's saying that while wearing a STAR TREK T-shirt.

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    1. Do Star Trek fans have a reputation for being offended by movie remakes?

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  16. Once again, the best part of this comic is the comments. :P

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  17. The snarkiness of this particular comment section is first rate, though, technically speaking, it's a sequel, too.

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  18. Sounds like friends talking to me.. but I don't care about Total Recall..

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