July 10, 2011

Regarding the RISE OF THE PLANET OF THE APES movie trailer...

19 comments:

  1. Yes. Because that's why a movie titled "Rise of the Planet of the Apes" will be bad. A general rule, anything with more than 4 words in the title is almost always a turkey.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Well it is going to be a bad movie. Not only does it contradict every single things established in the earlier movies, it makes no sense logically either. Ok, so the apes all have spears and are grouping together. Yup, we're fucked, cause all we have is guns and body armor that can stop bullets. Whatever shall we do!?!? Also, how many apes can there be in the larger LA area? A few hundred, tops? That uprising would be quelled in a matter of hours. Also, I'm sorry, I just can't accept James Franco as a brilliant geneticist. It's like when they wanted us to believe the character of Christmas Jones in that one Bond movie, or Arnold as a scientist in Batman & Robin. It just doesn't fit.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I wonder how this guy liked Avatar...

    ReplyDelete
  4. Man, he musta HATED The Dark Knight.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Just to clarify, when he says "we": is or subject man or ape?

    ReplyDelete
  6. er, is "our" subject-- NEVERMIND

    ReplyDelete
  7. Right, because to this point all the Planet of the Apes movies have been internally consistent, both with each other and the book. And none of them have sucked.

    Back to the original guy: the worst of the Apes movies was the only one in which the humans won. With the apes, sure, but they won.

    ReplyDelete
  8. The movie's going to be gay? Its going to have homosexual apes? I might go see it now.

    ReplyDelete
  9. When I first saw the trailer I was hoping it was an Ape Escape movie.

    ReplyDelete
  10. When I first saw the trailer I thought it looked like it might be interesting. Then I discovered what the title was and went "aww man ANOTHER remake/reboot/rewhatever" Kiss of death, right there.

    ReplyDelete
  11. He must have HATED Empire Strikes Back

    ReplyDelete
  12. Out of Left Field Guy7/10/2011 10:04 PM

    If it's got big, burly homosexuals, shouldn't it be called "Rise of the Planet of the Bears?"

    By the way, when it gets made, I expect royalties.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Another really sad thing about the development of this film is that everyone seems to be overlooking the fact that the plot is identical to DEEP BLUE SEA.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Funny, I'm more likely to go see a movie where we don't win at the end. Not that I'm planning to see Rise of the Planet of the Apes, god no.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Escape was by far the worst. The way it starts we are supposed to assume that, not only did Cornelious and Zira somehow predict that Taylor would spontaneously blow up the planet, but they also managed to rescue the sunken ship and repair it in time to take off before he did it. Also, they managed to repair and pilot the ship, even though they were members of a primative society that didn't even have cars.

    ReplyDelete
  16. I think you need to watch Battle again. It clearly had the lowest budget of any of the films. It looked cheaper than the TV show, and the writing and acting were horrid. I guess they blew all their money on the ape makeup, because the mutant makeup and those cars they drove were just thrown together.

    Those points are valid about Escape, but that all happened before the movie started. Once the film got going it was pretty good. Conquest was better, but Battle was just hideous.

    ReplyDelete
  17. I guess the worst movies would be the 5 made for TV movies. They were made entirely out of footage from the TV series:

    1 Back to the Planet of the Apes
    2 Forgotten City of the Planet of the Apes
    3 Treachery and Greed on the Planet of the Apes
    4 Life, Liberty and Pursuit on the Planet of the Apes
    5 Farewell to the Planet of the Apes

    Two years ago there was a marathon around Thanksgiving.

    ReplyDelete
  18. How can a movie with the line "I loathe bananas" be the worst?

    ReplyDelete
  19. Well would ya look at that, the movie turned out to be awesome. Also, the people who complain about how the apes would not be able to take us over should probably watch the frickin' movie before they say it doesn't make sense.

    ReplyDelete

.

.