September 4, 2011

While trying to return an issue of BATMAN: ODYSSEY...


27 comments:

  1. I am shocked to learn that a comic called Batman: Odyssey has Batman in it.

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  2. I can't wait until she's trying to teach her son about history and rents American History X to show him.

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  3. I am shocked to learn that a comic with Batman on the cover has Batman inside it.

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  4. Wait, Homer writes Batman?

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  5. I bought the Odyssey thinking it would have Batman in it but in fact, it's only about Ulysses and my son won't be reading anything with Ulysses in it!

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  6. Okay, I can understand get not wanting your kid to read a particular comic based on its content. Most main DCU and Marvel comics seem to be pitched like high-school age or older right now. I'll concede that much. But a blanket objection to Batman? What gives? Is she trying to protect her precious little snowflake from the idea that parents can die?

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  7. This is aside of course, from the obvious, "What the hell did you think you were getting when you got a comic with a giant Batman on the front cover" and the equally obvious, "These things aren't wrapped up or anything; why didn't you flip through it before you gave it to your friggin' child?"

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  8. I like this because a horrible idiot is trying to teach her son about classic literature but most likely he'll end up a heroin addict because of her terrible parenting and idiot mind.

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  9. Yes, the big issue is that she was buying him a comic book of what she thought was Homer's Odyssey.

    Obvious she should have bought Clash of the Titans of DVD instead.

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  10. Of all the reasons to be disappointed with Batman: Odyssey...

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  11. At least he won't be reading THAT version of Batman. Geez, Kevin Smith, stick to movies.

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  12. Batman: Odyssey is written by Neal Adams. Kevin Smith wrote Cacophony and Widening Gyre.

    And cmon look at the content before you buy, it takes two frickin' seconds! How do you miss the Bat?!

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  13. So, then what happened?

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  14. One of the last times I went into a video store (remember them?), a little girl asked her mom to rent Disney's "Pocahontas." Mom exploded into a bellowing tirade about the film "whitewashes the murder of the Native American people" and kept right on yelling well past the point her child burst into embarrassed tears. The guy behind the counter intervened just to take the heat off the kid for a few moments.

    Instead of letting her watch a Disney princess movie for a measly hour-and-a-half and using the opportunity to have an age-appropriate "teachable moment," this Berkeley berzerker chose instead to publicly humiliate her own daughter so strangers could see how "progressive" she was.

    To drive a car, you have to learn rules and obtain a license but to be a parent all you have to do is get knocked up.

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  15. Yo dawg, I heard you like Batman so I put some Batman in your Batman!

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  16. ZombiWorkshop9/04/2011 6:14 PM

    Response : "C'mon, neither you nor I are that stupid. If you didn't want him to read a Batman book A) Why would you buy a book with Batman on the cover and B) It's not like the title "BATMAN" is in small letters, the "ODYSSEY" part is much smaller. If you want your money back, that's one thing, but if you're that stupid - social services may want to know..."

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  17. To be fair, Homer's Odyssey has some batman in it. It's just not completely filled with batman.

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  18. I was well and truly ripped off with my copy of The Odyessy. No Batman or Ulyssess, instead it had some joker named Odysseus * sigh *

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  19. I bought Oddworld: Abe's Oddysey because I thought it had Ulysses in it. Imagine my surprise when I found out it was just some green guy who farts.

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  20. Wait...she went to a comic book store to buy classical Greek literature? Clearly she has a legitimate excuse for failing to notice all the Batman-ness about the title she picked up. Her brain is broken.

    @ Doctor Tarr:
    Actually, I had a high school lit class where we had to watch the original version. That was kind of a surreal moment, considering that's the same teacher who took a pair of scissors to a deck of cards because some of my friends were playing poker after completing the day's assignment.

    @ Bryan:
    Well, yes, he mostly just skulks on top of the closest tall building, waiting for crime to happen. Legally speaking, though, it's a tough call as to whether Oddysseus is breaking the laws of the legitimate local governments, or the corrupt local goverments are abusing their authority on the various cruise ship tourists who pass through.

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  21. To be honest, I wouldn't let anyone read Batman: Odyssey either if I could help it.

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  22. "Sworn to secrecy, ha ha! Such a thing! Such an octopus of a thing!"

    Yeah, maybe the kid would be better off without that version of Batman in their minds...

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  23. So, she would rather her son read about a "hero" who abandons his wife to selflishly pursue adventure (including being tempted by sirens), and then, upon returning, disguise himself from her while he watches her struggle with feeding and entertaining a bunch of low-life who want to marry her, instead of reading about someone who tries to make his city a better place by pursuing criminals?

    oh, wait, what if she was talking about the james joyce version of ulysses? because if THAT were the case, unless her son is an adult, how could she possible prefer that to batman?

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  24. What I'm wondering is why she thought the Odyssey was better for her child than Batman. Sure, the Odyssey is a classic, but is it really appropriate for children? I mean, have you ever read it? If made into a faithful movie, it'd be a hard R.

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  25. You should have told her about a fine modernist take on the classical hero Ulysses, penned by one Mr. James Joyce. It would be a fine book for the young lad.

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  26. (25 years ago)

    "I bought my son this game Robot Odyssey thinking it was about Ulysses, but in fact it was a puzzle adventure game which teaches kids the basics of electronic logic circuits. Do you think I want my kid growing up to be an electrical engineer? Money back, please."

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  27. I bought my son 2001: A Space Odyssey thinking it was about Ulysses, but in fact it was about a magic block and space babies.

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