August 11, 2011

While buying the new issue of GOLD DIGGERS...

Today's customer was submitted by comic shop employee
Andrea Purcell who heard this while she was at work. She 
went on to explain her interaction with this guy...

"He then proceeded to tell us about all of the other animals 
that had “presented” themselves to him, because his pheromones 
were that amazing. However, he is still holding out for his panther. 
He had the whole plan scarily thought out, and even had a plan
if the ASPCA tried to take his “mate “ away from him. Needless 
to say, no one wanted to ever go to the zoo with him."

Yikes.

42 comments:

  1. Kitana Coldfire8/11/2011 1:48 PM

    . . . I need some mind bleach over here. NOW PLEASE GOD.

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  2. Gold DiggerS?

    But yeah, yikes indeed. I wonder if having "amazing pheromones" is code for "I don't use deodorant."

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  3. Well, that's probably going to be the most disturbing thing I hear all week.

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  4. If he's looking for an animal mate - Well that takes one genetic code out of our genome

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  5. I-
    I don't-
    What the-
    This is-

    MIND ASPLODES

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  6. Oh god...
    Thats horrible.
    Especially horrible for me since I love that comic.
    ...
    And Brittany is a Were-CHEETAH, you dumbass.
    Just sayin..

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  7. I wonder if other specialty stores out there (Mattress Stores? Nail Salons? Deli's?) have this high a percentages of creeps, oddballs and jerks as Comic Shops. Or are the comic book customers just more obvious/vocal about it?

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  8. Figures he'd be reading Gold Diggers, isn't one of the main characters in that one of those weird manga cat ladies or something?

    (I just sell the stuff and try not to snicker too loudly in front of the customers)

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  9. I can't make a joke out of this. Gross.

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  10. Sex Panther:

    60% of the time, it works everytime.

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  11. Be afraid. Be very afraid.

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  12. What's REALLY shocking here is that they STILL MAKE Gold Digger?!?!?! -That's a blast from, like, 1993! And I JUST saw that "Cheetah" (Brittany) Action Figure loose in a bin at The Dirt-Mall a week ago, and I laughed...

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  13. I'm fairly certain that a full grown panther would tear him to ribbons, raised from birth or not. With that in mind, I hope he finds his "dream girl" real soon.

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  14. I said the erotic-blog-pic guy was the most appropriate recipient of the 'creeps' label. The torch has been passed.

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  15. OH GOD NO. SWEET LORD NO. IT BURNS... IT BURNS!

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  16. He has to be trolling. Nobody would be that vocal about wanting to fuck an animal, nor would they brag about past "experiences" with animals.

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  17. I'm not sure "trolling" is the word for it. He had no way of knowing a complete stranger would submit him to a webcomic.

    I worked in a psych ward for two years. People are vocal about a LOT of stuff.

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  18. How am I so certain that none of the animals that "presented" themselves to him were not human.

    Dude seriously needs the ASPCA sicked on him.

    However as anonymous @6:22 points out he will probably Darwin Award himself out of existence if his plan goes through.

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  19. Ooops typo, there should be no not in my first sentence.

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  20. I think I'm going to get a job with the ASPCA so I can give this guy a 9mm lobotomy when we have to take his girlfriend from him.

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  21. Furries are the lowest form of scum. We need a real-life LOLocaust to thin out their ranks.

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  22. "Furries are the lowest form of scum. We need a real-life LOLocaust to thin out their ranks."

    Get over yourself. Internet Tough Guy Nazis are as bad as the worst furry. Brit, Tigra, or whoever wouldn't have either of you on a dare.

    Disclaimer: I'd totally bang Pinkie Pie. But there's a huge difference.

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  23. i bet he's a fan of that documentary "ZOO" and if it any consolation he will DEFINITELY die a death akin to "GRIZZLY MAN"

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  24. He probably doesn't watch Fatal Attraction on Animal Planet...

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  25. Furries are a little weird. I dont see any other community with the feel-good stuff and self-help books with anthropomorphic characters. Don't care if it comes from the heart or not; it's creepy.

    p. sure wanting to fuck an actual animal doesn't make him a furry, though

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  26. @Anon 9:12, It doesn't make him a furry, but between that and buying Gold Diggers, it's not a bad guess.
    It's freaks like this guy that give the rest of furries a bad name.

    @Anon 6:06, who wouldn't?!

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  27. Anonymous said...

    "Furries are the lowest form of scum. We need a real-life LOLocaust to thin out their ranks."

    Get over yourself. Internet Tough Guy Nazis are as bad as the worst furry. Brit, Tigra, or whoever wouldn't have either of you on a dare.

    Disclaimer: I'd totally bang Pinkie Pie. But there's a huge difference.


    but what about all the good things Wolf Hitler did for AnthroGermany?

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  28. For what it's worth, I don't believe most furries actually want to have sex with animals. I believe they want to have sex AS animals, a totally different thing, a totally different and (IMHO) benign thing.

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  29. Oops. Darn uneditable comments. Department of Redundancy Department Head here.

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  30. So he likes Anita Blake novels?

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  31. Being a furry, has absolutely NO CORRELATION with wanting to 'bang' animals. That's zoophilia :3

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  32. WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

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  33. On the plus side the panther would probably deal with things herself....I don't think we'd have to worry about him for long if he actually DID get one.

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  34. This guy is not a furry. I've been in the fandom for over 20 years and even for the out-there parts of the fandom, this is still looked as creepy and do-not-want. If he means it, he's disturbed, period.

    And yes, Gold Digger is still being made, it's still as silly and now very convoluted, but it's also still being made by the same guy, month after month, indefatigably, and he still has a blast doing it. Gotta give him props for that.

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  35. "Being a furry, has absolutely NO CORRELATION with wanting to 'bang' animals."

    Except yanking and wanking over pics of yiffy foxgrrls.

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  36. ^ That's xenophilia, which is something entirely different than zoophilia. The difference being, the former has better conversation.

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  37. I vote this guy to win.

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  38. Holy crap, I think I know this guy. If he's who I think he is, he's a local character who basically got ostracized from the local gaming scene for being loud and creepy.

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  39. I'm a fur and I have to forheadpalm at this.

    I guess we really do ruin everything.

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  40. This guy needs to be president.
    He'd do a better job than Obama.

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  41. At least he's only abusing animals. . .we can hope.

    Now maybe it's just because earlier today I read an article touching on the common predator practices of pedophiles, including "grooming" children in much the same fashion this guy talks about doing with a panther, but I'm not seeing anything even a little bit funny about this.

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